Sunday, September 13, 2015
Sunday, March 7, 2010
What is love? How does it happen?
I don’t think I am capable, eligible or experienced enough to either explain what love is or how it happens but I will take a shot at it. Had I known the inner secrets of love things would have been so much different in life not just mine but a lot of other people that I know. So getting back to the never ending quest,
“What exactly is love?”
Well, love is defined in a number of different ways by different people most commonly heard as “Love is a feeling” but to me love is not just a feeling, it definitely begins as a feeling but is much more by the time a person realizes it. It need not necessarily be between a guy and a girl, the essence of love is the same whether it is between a parent and a child or siblings or even between a guy and a girl. There is no categorization in love. Either you love someone or you don’t but there definitely is an extent to which you love a person. Love is a feeling that makes people either do or not do things that they usually would do or not do if they were not in love. Maybe a little confusing but this is what I mean by it, Love changes people in such a way that not just others but the person him/her self will notice the changes in them. The person is love tries to blend into the likes and dislikes of the person they are in love with. This can be noticed in any case. I have noticed my parent’s life spinning around the likes and dislikes of us (me and my sister). I was shocked to find a totally different me and I kind of hated the fact that I changed as much but then I realized that it is not something that happens or one does on purpose. It’s not a bad thing to change for the people that you love but the cost of changing oneself for someone else is heavy.
Well, without drifting away from the actual topic, love is not something anyone can force be it between parents and kids or siblings or two people. Some people say that parents have to love their children, wife/husband has to love their spouse or siblings should always love each other. Nobody has to do anything in this world. It’s all a choice that every person makes and lives by it. Some make good choices while others make, let me call them, not so good choices. I have seen parents that hate their kids and vice versa, we all have read news where there has been hatred among the people that are supposed to be together and loving each other. These are some of the examples of why man need not do anything. Most of the rules set by the society are made by people like you and I. It is not necessary that everyone has to agree with the other person all the time. Love is an attitude that you have towards your fellow being, it does not have to be associated with a relation or a name all the time, even though the society disagrees with this.
Love begins as a feeling in a person which makes the person change (maybe for good or for bad), makes the person do a lot of things depending on to what extent his/her love is. It is also not necessary that if you love someone you have to get the same love in return – actually this seldom happens. We have all heard – Love without expecting anything in return – but we are after all human. We are weak and are incapable of lifting ourselves above a standard. Love without expecting anything in return would be unconditional love. We have all read about this in books but did we see anyone like this? Maybe some people do but for now all I can say is that it is above human standards to love everyone unconditionally.
Love happens, but how? Well, love happens sometimes because it is bound to happen like in the case of parents and kids or siblings, they know the other person and they have an idea that they have to like and love the person but this does not necessarily end up being love all the time. Depends on a various other conditions and just like this people fall in love for a lot of reasons. People love something or someone because they either find something that they are used to or something that touches them and this same feeling over a period of time grows into an inseparable bond between the two people or the person and the thing. It is also a feeling that is caused by getting used to the person or the thing. Feeling of love grows stronger by getting used to. There are different ways a person can show their love it can be by buying gifts or by hugs and kisses but the best way is to be available when you are needed the most. This is one way of showing your love that can never be beaten.
Every human is capable of loving. Everyone has experienced the feeling of love sometime or the other, be it towards another person, for a thing or another feeling. When someone says, “I hate that person with all my heart” they are saying that they love the feeling of hating that person. It might sound like magic of words but this is the fact. Someone once said, it’s all about choices and the decisions we make. When someone says “No” to something they are automatically saying “Yes” to something else. It’s a choice they made.
The bottom line is, Yes Love is a feeling and a lot more than just being a feeling. Every person is capable of loving, try to love everyone around you but also remember that we are all human so do not expect someone to love without any expectations. Love is beautiful, love is great but like all other things there are two sides to it. It can be the best while it can be the worst so maintaining the balance and gaining the composure to handle it the right way is a primary requirement.
“What exactly is love?”
Well, love is defined in a number of different ways by different people most commonly heard as “Love is a feeling” but to me love is not just a feeling, it definitely begins as a feeling but is much more by the time a person realizes it. It need not necessarily be between a guy and a girl, the essence of love is the same whether it is between a parent and a child or siblings or even between a guy and a girl. There is no categorization in love. Either you love someone or you don’t but there definitely is an extent to which you love a person. Love is a feeling that makes people either do or not do things that they usually would do or not do if they were not in love. Maybe a little confusing but this is what I mean by it, Love changes people in such a way that not just others but the person him/her self will notice the changes in them. The person is love tries to blend into the likes and dislikes of the person they are in love with. This can be noticed in any case. I have noticed my parent’s life spinning around the likes and dislikes of us (me and my sister). I was shocked to find a totally different me and I kind of hated the fact that I changed as much but then I realized that it is not something that happens or one does on purpose. It’s not a bad thing to change for the people that you love but the cost of changing oneself for someone else is heavy.
Well, without drifting away from the actual topic, love is not something anyone can force be it between parents and kids or siblings or two people. Some people say that parents have to love their children, wife/husband has to love their spouse or siblings should always love each other. Nobody has to do anything in this world. It’s all a choice that every person makes and lives by it. Some make good choices while others make, let me call them, not so good choices. I have seen parents that hate their kids and vice versa, we all have read news where there has been hatred among the people that are supposed to be together and loving each other. These are some of the examples of why man need not do anything. Most of the rules set by the society are made by people like you and I. It is not necessary that everyone has to agree with the other person all the time. Love is an attitude that you have towards your fellow being, it does not have to be associated with a relation or a name all the time, even though the society disagrees with this.
Love begins as a feeling in a person which makes the person change (maybe for good or for bad), makes the person do a lot of things depending on to what extent his/her love is. It is also not necessary that if you love someone you have to get the same love in return – actually this seldom happens. We have all heard – Love without expecting anything in return – but we are after all human. We are weak and are incapable of lifting ourselves above a standard. Love without expecting anything in return would be unconditional love. We have all read about this in books but did we see anyone like this? Maybe some people do but for now all I can say is that it is above human standards to love everyone unconditionally.
Love happens, but how? Well, love happens sometimes because it is bound to happen like in the case of parents and kids or siblings, they know the other person and they have an idea that they have to like and love the person but this does not necessarily end up being love all the time. Depends on a various other conditions and just like this people fall in love for a lot of reasons. People love something or someone because they either find something that they are used to or something that touches them and this same feeling over a period of time grows into an inseparable bond between the two people or the person and the thing. It is also a feeling that is caused by getting used to the person or the thing. Feeling of love grows stronger by getting used to. There are different ways a person can show their love it can be by buying gifts or by hugs and kisses but the best way is to be available when you are needed the most. This is one way of showing your love that can never be beaten.
Every human is capable of loving. Everyone has experienced the feeling of love sometime or the other, be it towards another person, for a thing or another feeling. When someone says, “I hate that person with all my heart” they are saying that they love the feeling of hating that person. It might sound like magic of words but this is the fact. Someone once said, it’s all about choices and the decisions we make. When someone says “No” to something they are automatically saying “Yes” to something else. It’s a choice they made.
The bottom line is, Yes Love is a feeling and a lot more than just being a feeling. Every person is capable of loving, try to love everyone around you but also remember that we are all human so do not expect someone to love without any expectations. Love is beautiful, love is great but like all other things there are two sides to it. It can be the best while it can be the worst so maintaining the balance and gaining the composure to handle it the right way is a primary requirement.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
No Pain, No Gain
A saying aimed at a single person where both pain and gain are intended for that person but I noticed that today it more means like “Someone’s pain is another’s gain.” The thought process of man has become so shallow and driven by greed that no matter how one decision/action of theirs will impact the other person they are focused on their own gain. Today we look at countries making decision that impact the very existence of other countries not just the countries governments, organizations and companies. It’s a known fact that everyone has to put in their effort to gain from their actions but my thought is that they need not be adversely impactful to the other person. I am no saint and I have made decisions where I focused on myself but I consciously try avoiding making such decisions but I have proven to myself that I am human more than a couple of times.
I would be lying to myself if I said “I am selfless and I have never done anything to hurt someone” because I know I am greedy (to an extent that is controllable and not harmful for others). Thinking ethically and morally no one can ever cause pain to others but then how can this be justified. In today’s competitive world where a person is looked up to by their position or the status how can it even be justified. Brother competes with brothers and they have ego and attitude problems because they do not look at each other as brothers but because they look at each other as competitors. This needs to be changed and people should be reminded of the very meaning of humanity. A person has to be self centric to move ahead in life and keep up with today’s world and in being successful now, they make certain decisions which seem to be unethical or immoral but can they be held accountable for it? Maybe, all humanity should stop for a moment and think where the world is heading and what is going on. Is this how the world is supposed to be or can we all make this better. To make this happen though, humanity should stop looking at the world the way it is today and have a positive and constructive attitude towards each other.
Competition can still be a part of the healthy world where we compete with others ethically and morally where no employee is exploited by any organization or no one can bribe the an officer to escape from law. All the countries are united and do not fight for the borders. A world that is filled with love and has no place for hatred is the kind of world I am looking forward to myself, the children of the future and everyone. Hope this comes true sometime in the future.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Why did God let this happen to me?
I have asked the same question to myself, my family and friends a long time back. This is a very general question that almost everyone would ask at any point of time be it for health, relationships, career or something else. Well, after a lot of years and a lot of thinking, listening to speakers and experiencing I understood the answer. The answer is, it is not God that let this happen to you, it is oneself that is responsible to everything.
God always wants His children to be safe and happy, no harm should come to them but no one is resistant to diseases, accidents or breakups. Why does this happen? The answer I found is that God also believes in free-will. God never stops anyone from doing anything; He is willing and waiting to help His children. He never lets the extreme happen to them He only lets them experience as much as they can. Although we do not know what our level of perseverance, it is very well known to Him. Now how does God’s free-will work?
The very obvious questions are, If God loved Adam & Eve then why did He let them commit the sin? Did God not know that Satan will be tempting Adam & Eve? The answer is God, the creator knows everything but the free-will offered to humans by God prevents Him from intervening in our lives and making us do what is good for us. We humans have the choice to pick and follow either good or bad. That is a right given to us by God and will not be taken away by Him. He shows us what is good & what is bad, we humans make the choice on what to do. Whether we pick good or bad He is always waiting and watching over us to let us realize and call upon Him. As soon as we call upon Him and confess we are in peace. God doesn’t want anyone to perish; there is no difference whether it’s a priest or a sinner.
Looking at the Bible, God could have prevented Eve from getting tempted and eating the fruit but did not. This doesn’t make God wrong, He did inform them earlier that the fruit is sinful and it should not be eaten. God could have prevented His beloved king David from committing a sin but it was up to King David to follow the path that the God has shown him.
Father Abraham followed everything that God has shown to him and asked him to but he still had to wait for 90 years to have kids. Why did this happen? Certain things happen to glorify God while others happen as a result of the choice we make. Even though Eve committed sin followed by Adam, King David committed sin, they were all forgiven. God was with them all along and is with them even now.
Stop looking at your situation & wondering “Why God did this to you?” Rather start analyzing and work in your life so you don’t repeat the mistake that was committed in the past and also make sure you make the right decision not just for you but everyone. Do not get disappointed in yourself or God, God alone will not do anything there has to be human effort to invoke God’s favor as well. So do not be disheartened, try and make the best decision you can not solely based on self but from the knowledge gained from the Holy book , the Bible as well as from the experience of elders. God doesn’t take sides neither does He punish or penalize any of His children. Be positive and try and do the right thing. Leave the rest to Him.
This doesn't mean that the person has to be guilty and is in a situation where God despises him/her. God is always watching out for His children and is preparing the person for the best in life because to appreciate the best it is important to know what worse feels like. So look forward to the future and live in present. Bad decisions and the mistakes of past should be forgotten and future should be taken with a very positive attitude and leave the rest to God because He sure is going to clear every mess His children get into and also prepare them to be better human being.
This doesn't mean that the person has to be guilty and is in a situation where God despises him/her. God is always watching out for His children and is preparing the person for the best in life because to appreciate the best it is important to know what worse feels like. So look forward to the future and live in present. Bad decisions and the mistakes of past should be forgotten and future should be taken with a very positive attitude and leave the rest to God because He sure is going to clear every mess His children get into and also prepare them to be better human being.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Persona-'s?
Been a while since i have blogged but i was focusing on myself to understand where I am and what I am becoming. I found a lot of things changed in me but something that i have noticed a lot over the few weeks is how many persona's i have been adopting to. I have known myself forever :) of course forever and I still know how stable I am. I am strong, confident and very adamant (for good or bad) when i want something i go after it with all that i have got. I mostly achieve it as long its a thing but when it comes to people its hard to justify the statement that "I want the person and so i will go after him/her"
Ever heard the saying, "If you love something, let go of it and if it belongs to you, it will come back to you"? I heard it quiet often, even though the statement is pretty straight forward its not the easiest thing to do. From my point of view, simplest things are the most difficult to do in real life. Now that i let go of someone i am sharing mixed feelings on one hand i want the person to be with me so i can be happy while on the other hand i want the person to be happy which could mean the person might not be with me. I feel love for her and then i get angry at her, some people say its normal.
If i really love her, should i try to make her understand that i love her and that i would do anything to keep her happy or just let her be happy and move on with my life? How will i know if she is happy? or should i just be concerned about my happiness? People say, things happen and life goes on. How can you invest so much energy, time and self into something and then just let go of it but on the other hand if you dont let go of it, it will still let go of you and you end up being at the same place where you were. Always make an attempt but where does this attempt end?
Coming back to the persona's topic, like i mentioned i have mixed feelings about the person whenever i think about her in different situations. How do i control my emotions and come to a point where i can say, alright i let go of you? I do not have any emotions neither love nor anger against you. I would like to get there and am working on it everyday. I made my priorities in life, work, work and work as long as i am here but before that my priority is my God and my family. I am excelling at work, i keep getting awards and commendations for my work which is great. I will keep achieving things and excelling just that at this point of time i do not know who i am doing all this for. Irrespective of my previous statement this is all good for me. I confess that i love her and i want her to be happy. I can get a little greedy and say i want to be happy too which is what i am working towards,
I want to achieve one persona, a persona of love, care, life and smile. I am making the effort on achieving this and i will achieve it.
Ever heard the saying, "If you love something, let go of it and if it belongs to you, it will come back to you"? I heard it quiet often, even though the statement is pretty straight forward its not the easiest thing to do. From my point of view, simplest things are the most difficult to do in real life. Now that i let go of someone i am sharing mixed feelings on one hand i want the person to be with me so i can be happy while on the other hand i want the person to be happy which could mean the person might not be with me. I feel love for her and then i get angry at her, some people say its normal.
If i really love her, should i try to make her understand that i love her and that i would do anything to keep her happy or just let her be happy and move on with my life? How will i know if she is happy? or should i just be concerned about my happiness? People say, things happen and life goes on. How can you invest so much energy, time and self into something and then just let go of it but on the other hand if you dont let go of it, it will still let go of you and you end up being at the same place where you were. Always make an attempt but where does this attempt end?
Coming back to the persona's topic, like i mentioned i have mixed feelings about the person whenever i think about her in different situations. How do i control my emotions and come to a point where i can say, alright i let go of you? I do not have any emotions neither love nor anger against you. I would like to get there and am working on it everyday. I made my priorities in life, work, work and work as long as i am here but before that my priority is my God and my family. I am excelling at work, i keep getting awards and commendations for my work which is great. I will keep achieving things and excelling just that at this point of time i do not know who i am doing all this for. Irrespective of my previous statement this is all good for me. I confess that i love her and i want her to be happy. I can get a little greedy and say i want to be happy too which is what i am working towards,
Been a while since i have blogged but i was focusing on myself to understand where I am and what I am becoming. I found a lot of things changed in me but something that i have noticed a lot over the few weeks is how many persona's i have been adopting to. I have known myself forever :) of course forever and I still know how stable I am. I am strong, confident and very adamant (for good or bad) when i want something i go after it with all that i have got. I mostly achieve it as long its a thing but when it comes to people its hard to justify the statement that "I want the person and so i will go after him/her"
Ever heard the saying, "If you love something, let go of it and if it belongs to you, it will come back to you"? I heard it quiet often, even though the statement is pretty straight forward its not the easiest thing to do. From my point of view, simplest things are the most difficult to do in real life. Now that i let go of someone i am sharing mixed feelings on one hand i want the person to be with me so i can be happy while on the other hand i want the person to be happy which could mean the person might not be with me. I feel love for her and then i get angry at her, some people say its normal.
If i really love her, should i try to make her understand that i love her and that i would do anything to keep her happy or just let her be happy and move on with my life? How will i know if she is happy? or should i just be concerned about my happiness? People say, things happen and life goes on. How can you invest so much energy, time and self into something and then just let go of it but on the other hand if you dont let go of it, it will still let go of you and you end up being at the same place where you were. Always make an attempt but where does this attempt end?
Coming back to the persona's topic, like i mentioned i have mixed feelings about the person whenever i think about her in different situations. How do i control my emotions and come to a point where i can say, alright i let go of you? I do not have any emotions neither love nor anger against you. I would like to get there and am working on it everyday. I made my priorities in life, work, work and work as long as i am here but before that my priority is my God and my family. I am excelling at work, i keep getting awards and commendations for my work which is great. I will keep achieving things and excelling just that at this point of time i do not know who i am doing all this for. Irrespective of my previous statement this is all good for me. I confess that i love her and i want her to be happy. I can get a little greedy and say i want to be happy too which is what i am working towards and i know i will achieve :) I am learning from the lessons in the past and this is my first step to achieving it.
Ever heard the saying, "If you love something, let go of it and if it belongs to you, it will come back to you"? I heard it quiet often, even though the statement is pretty straight forward its not the easiest thing to do. From my point of view, simplest things are the most difficult to do in real life. Now that i let go of someone i am sharing mixed feelings on one hand i want the person to be with me so i can be happy while on the other hand i want the person to be happy which could mean the person might not be with me. I feel love for her and then i get angry at her, some people say its normal.
If i really love her, should i try to make her understand that i love her and that i would do anything to keep her happy or just let her be happy and move on with my life? How will i know if she is happy? or should i just be concerned about my happiness? People say, things happen and life goes on. How can you invest so much energy, time and self into something and then just let go of it but on the other hand if you dont let go of it, it will still let go of you and you end up being at the same place where you were. Always make an attempt but where does this attempt end?
Coming back to the persona's topic, like i mentioned i have mixed feelings about the person whenever i think about her in different situations. How do i control my emotions and come to a point where i can say, alright i let go of you? I do not have any emotions neither love nor anger against you. I would like to get there and am working on it everyday. I made my priorities in life, work, work and work as long as i am here but before that my priority is my God and my family. I am excelling at work, i keep getting awards and commendations for my work which is great. I will keep achieving things and excelling just that at this point of time i do not know who i am doing all this for. Irrespective of my previous statement this is all good for me. I confess that i love her and i want her to be happy. I can get a little greedy and say i want to be happy too which is what i am working towards and i know i will achieve :) I am learning from the lessons in the past and this is my first step to achieving it.
I want to achieve one persona, a persona of love, care, life and smile. I am making the effort on achieving this and i will achieve it.
Friday, August 28, 2009
Happiness
All my blog entries from now on will be to see what can make me happy and what is it that i can do to spread that happiness.
Live, Love and Laugh... still have your values and live by them.
Even though i want to and i know i find it hard right now to love everyone around me, including the ones that really insulted me or abused me, i will do it. Most important thing would be doing it with satisfaction.
I will do IT.
Live, Love and Laugh... still have your values and live by them.
Even though i want to and i know i find it hard right now to love everyone around me, including the ones that really insulted me or abused me, i will do it. Most important thing would be doing it with satisfaction.
I will do IT.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Night sky with stars..
I heard about the meteor shower from a colleague and decided to go watch it. After a long time... a very long time, i drove in the night to the foot hills and parked there waiting to see the meteors. One thing that i really miss in USA from India is lying down on the terrace and just staring into the sky looking at all the stars twinkling. Thats what i got to do yesterday night, even though there was no terrace i did climb up onto my car and lay down there for quiet a while. Night sky is just so amazing with stars. Its so calm and soothing, lets you think a lot clearer.
TBC
TBC
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